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The Politics of Lacrosse

Within our own Lacrossocratic party and against the other parties of the old schoolian dynasties, the political forces of Good and Dr. Evil are shaping the future of our game. Before we renew our battles against the other sports for field time and athletic department/club sports funds we must look at our own political squabbles and become stronger from within.

1. The MCLA must continue its peaceful protest against the NCAA.

A few weeks ago Michigan beat Bellarmine in a preseason scrimmage and it highlighted the divide between the old guard and the new. I know this horse is nearly beat to death, but I believe it necessary to get my kick in.

Michigan and a few other MCLA teams have programs that are more D1 than most D1 schools. Hey Lehigh, I’ve got a quick question for you. When was the last time one of the world’s largest athletic brands (Adidas) asked for your thoughts on making something? Never? That’s what I thought. Michigan has Adidas’ ear and the German-based company is listening. With that said, the old guard of the Lacrossocratic party need to recognize what the new guard brings: money, bargaining power, and whatever else goes along with being a BCS Football school. Change is good. For that matter, so is Hope.

2. The Wild, Wild West that is the Lacrosse Industry Needs to stay Wild, Wild

After attending LaxCon 2010 I could not believe the size of the lacrosse cottage industry. From lax gadgets to uniforms, everyone and their soccer mom is out for a piece of lax pie. I firmly believe that competition is a good thing, especially in a sport with such a narrow history. I have heard stories about Bacharach when they were the name in the sport and now they are a middle of the pack brand. But now you can get heads, shafts, gloves, etc. without having to travel to Baltimore, and instead of having to stockpile, you can get replacement gear down the road or overnight. Who knows what the next great lax breakthrough will be and as long as we have savvy entrepreneurs like Maverik pushing the Brine’s and STX’s of the World, only good things are to come.

3. College and High School Clubs Need to Channel Their Inner Hillary Clinton

As the campaign season begins, clubs need to remember to choose their battles wisely and fight fairly. Not being able to wear your school’s name on your jersey or being forced to practice at a local city park sucks, but Lacrossocrats need to tread lightly with our old school “foes.” High school athletic directors and Club Sports directors across the country cannot enjoy paperwork anymore than we do, so do it with a smile and kill ‘em with kindness like a true diplomat. If and when that plan fails, we must fall back on what we can control: creating programs that are as efficient and well run as our varsity counterparts.

My fellow Lacrossocratic precinct chair 412 has taken to calling teams with Nike uniforms members of Nike U. As an astute commenter pointed out, all the teams at their university wore Nike, so they wore Nike to fit in. Looks like a Duck, quacks like a Duck, it must be a duck. Looks like a Varsity team, acts like a Varsity team, must be a Varsity team. So Nike or Adidas U ain’t all that bad. Aside from looks, ensuring that the bureaucrat’s workload does not increase because of your club does wonders in generating good will. So when you want to call out some schlub for becoming territorial about the Varsity cheerleaders’’ water bottles, just remember to ask yourself… what would Hillary do?

About the author
: After playing high school ball at Idaho powerhouse Bishop Kelly, Jumbo Jack went on to the University of Utah where he was a 2005 Rocky Mountain Lacrosse Conference All-Conference pick. From there he moved to Mt. St. Mary’s University in Maryland, where he became the first Idahoan to be on a Division 1 Lacrosse roster. Following a knee injury, he coached and played for the University of Idaho, helping lead the team to their first program wins and earning 2008 Pacific Northwest Lacrosse Conference honors. He is currently attending law school.

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